How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
Even though we had just had to physically take her off of someones lawn she was peeing on when they came outside, she still insisted on walking unassisted the rest of the way home. It was dignity meets shit show.
I don't judge her for getting booty calls at 2 in the morning, so she can't judge me for staying in friday nights and putting spray cheese on pringles.
I just threw out a whole Christmas ham, 12 positive pregnancy tests, 3 empty vodka bottles and by ex boyfriends Latina porn collection in the same garbage bag. The homeless person who goes through the bins tonight knows I have nothing left to loose.
My new roommate is awesome. His father owns a bar and his sister has an E cup. I'm going to be with him forever
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
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