Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
I can see why you broke up with her now... it was like having sex with a corpse.
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
I didn't know he had a girlfriend until after we had sex when he said, "Man I really gotta stop cheating on my girlfriend."
Ran into his sister at the gym and hit it in the parking lot. I dont even feel like a bad friend she got a boob job and lost 20 lbs its not even the same sister
Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
OMG MY DAD TOLD ME HE MIGHT DO TINDER
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
Randomize
