i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
You stood outside his house all night throwing your sister's leftover Easter eggs and singing 'now you're just somebody that I used to blow'
I won't apologize to a one balled man
I can't wait til I'm a real grown up and am no longer expected to take 7 shots of raspberry ruby as a pregame to a night of drinking natty lite
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
So I got cockblocked by our relationship status last night
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
Randomize