woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
you turned your livingroom into a bong?
he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
Who knew that "When in doubt, pelvic thrust" would end up being the best motto ever? In other news, I think I may have joined roller derby.
We are finally out of the honeymoon stage of the relationship because it turns out that you can't come back from peeing on me in your sleep.
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
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