i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
Ended up passed out drunk in the neighbors lawn, still in costume. Neighbors thought I was a lawn decoration. Ten points for best Halloween ever.
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
I didn't know your ex looked like a male Khloe Kardashian?
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
Randomize
