We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.
was the water running?
yeah but he said he knows how to swim
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
he doesn't even text me anymore.. he just facebook chats me a shark emoticon which has turned into code for 'be naked at my house in 15 mins'
You're gonna be proud in the future that you fucked the next bill gates
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
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