Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
bitch asked me if i cared if she kept her snuggie on while we had sex
i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
Now I'm obligated to stay and cuddle with her because the condom broke. Fuck.
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
Drunk packed a lunch. Made two turkey sandwiches and threw in a bag of raw bacon. Gold star for the day drunk self.
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
Randomize
