it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
he just booty called me in advance instead of waiting til 3 am when hes trashed. i think thats really considerate and gentlemanlike.
She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
So I put about 15 worms in the cuervo bottle. I don't think that's how it works but I feel like hallucinating by 11am
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
Even my vagina gasped.
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
Personally, if my roommate had a nice friend who made me dinner, gave me free beer, a 4am meal, a couch to sleep on in an apartment on the beach, and breakfast when I woke up, and I found out that said roommate was fucking her, I'd be all... right on! She's cool! Thanks for the quesadillas!
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
My vibrator broke.
Dude it's been less than twelve hours. Did you sleep?
Don't worry about that. I need a new vibrator.
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