do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
It felt like he was juggling my kidneys with the head of his penis... If you could even call it that, it was more like a lochness monster. Huge and mythical.
Chris threw beer can at guy. Guy ended up being a fighter. Chris got his eye socket broke. Fighter got hand re-broke. Chris is passed out. Fighter is in kellys bed. everybody won last night. I think.
So I craigslisted sugar daddies and I'm pretty sure I found us one if you can pretend to be asian.
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
want me to make you a grilled cheese? I can't guarantee it'll be as good as yours but i'll go down on you afterwards if you want
brb printing out this text and putting it on my bedroom wall
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
So it turns out "let's pretend to be gay so guys will stop hitting on us" was step one in her plan to get me into bed...
So why exactly are your shoes in my freezer?
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
Also I know now I was meant to be a comedian. Had both arresting officers laughing.
Randomize
