He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
an off duty cop drove behind me last night to make sure i didnt get a dui. i was blacked out drunk and on a pill of ecstacy. he knew this. i must be really pretty.
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
oh no, im for sure still drunk. i wana eat evrything in the fancy feast commercial... everything
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today....
onest when I told you I'm a paramedic but I'm also a stripper.
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
When he was fat he reminded me of my high school best friend and I just wanted to hug him and hug him. Also, he's funny and humor is the fastest way into my pants after Doctor Who and liquor.
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
Randomize
