after the first blizzard, i went out and bought a thirty and put it in a cooler and hid it out in the backyard. now the second blizzard has deposited 2 feet of snow on top of said cooler. there is a shovel and treasure map over here waiting for you
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
Babe, I'm gunna be straight with you. When you act like a dick it makes me regret not fucking my manager last week.
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
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