He asked to "fluff my boner.."
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
She had her insurance card taped to her arm because it was the only thing she "couldn't take off and lose"
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
i wore just an American flag as my costume-huge success. 20 people pledged allegiance to my ass including a senior frat boy at the keg. God bless America.
He was leaving the restaurant I was going to as I was parking. I didn't want to scream, "hey, didn't I jerk you off?" Out of my window at 10 am
Why the fuck am I at this dorm meeting? I don't pay $50,000 a year to stay sober.
It's his. I know, I'm pregnant with a genetic douche bag but at least he'll be pretty!
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
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