at 4 in the morning i heated a family sized mac n cheese for a minute and decided to eat it frozen cuz I didn't wanna wait for that long
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
I woke up with semen in my invisalign. My molars were just marinating in it
i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
I managed to convince him it was his fault I cheated on him...he spent the last 40 minutes going down on me. I feel legendary.
I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
It's dangerous to be this horny at work. I'm gonna stain my desk chair
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
Randomize
