well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
I sobered up in the middle of it, that I was hooking up with him in a rosemary bush. I woke up smelling like a pasta dish
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
I could fuck to npr.
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
I had to put my dog down, accidentally outed my brother, and was given a fucking fish sandwich instead of a Big Mac ALL IN ONE DAY! Am I really the person you want to consult for advice? Hhhmmmmmm?
Randomize