A homeless man in dtwn SF was blasting lil wayne and singing at the top of his lungs. I kinda wanted to give him my life savings
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
I just realized I have yet to puke in your new apartment. Clearly we're doing something wrong. On my way over with Cuervo as I type.
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
I forgot drug dealers have families, too. Cheers to a sober, uncomfortable, slightly enraging Thanksgiving.
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
Randomize
