You can't special order awesome
i just threw up in front of the washington monument. such a scenic puke.
Bring your kids so they can distract our kids so we can drink beer in peace.
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
I'm calling into work with a wicked case of sledge hammer crotch. She has to understand
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
Randomize
