Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
I just realized that my mother and I have the same favorite sex position, Guess which one!
OMG! Ew.
Lucky Dad.
What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
Theres a live mouse in the toilet. Goddamn you this is why I don't party here
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
He showed up at my door at 3 AM wearing a Santa hat with a tiara attached.
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
I have a cat for love and a booty call for sex. What else could I need?
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
Randomize
