I really liked your hair last night but that style makes it really hard to hold it while you puke
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
Carrying your underwear around in your purse on Sunday morning is its own religious experience
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
Just so you know my hand is still healing from where you drunkenly clawed me last Saturday
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
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