He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
i told him he had the best dick i've ever seen. then supposedly i kept repeating "peter piper picked the perfect penis"
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
woke up with a sweatshirt on that said "someone special calls me grandma" and a sword. i'm just going to assume that it was a good night
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
Thanks for walking over, a conversation about David Bowie's dick as a muppet is exactly what my day was missing.
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
Yeah, tell that to my thumb. Cause it was up my ass all night waiting for you.
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
He sat next to me, put his arm around me, yelled at his girlfriend that he was breaking up with her, and told me I'm his little pet for the night.
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
Randomize
