Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
Why did you video tape me drying my boxers in the microwave?
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
Oh shit. Easter I forgot. Maybe we should leave the illegal stuff for when Jesus is less present.
He told me he breastfed 'til he was six. That explains the obsession with me getting fake tits. Is it a red flag?
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
Randomize
