We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
You left the resturant and came back with a McDonalds burger in your pocket so ya...no more pregaming birthday dinners. Especially since it wasn't your birthday.
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
How long have I been using my debit card as a coaster?
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
I feel like my liver should be on crutches right now
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
Randomize
