just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
i wish i could tell you the night didnt begin with me drinking alone
DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
Apparently unused tampons can also double as things to bite down on during public sex to prevent screaming...
I pretended to be blind and he pretended to be my assistant and long story short, we had to buy that bra and panty set, and now we're both banned from Victoria's Secret AND I have a cum stained demi cup.
What kind of friend would I be if I didn't make you hate things you once loved?
We've been taking shots, cranking Marilyn Manson, and eating your bacon. Your kid is probably ruined.
"keg stand!" on a roof abruptly turned into "call the medics"
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