Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
Im calling him
was mistake calling. If you drunk dial someone you deserve to choke on a tubesock. Take the advice. Always remember
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
Seriously though, passing out on the police station floor must have been priceless!
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
Afterwards the first thing I said was, "You know, you're probably the first guy who has ever gotten laid wearing Star Wars pajama bottoms."
Don't do tequila. The Devil himself spits into shot glasses and we call it tequila. You will do bad things.
Randomize
