you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
It's what America was founded on: former hookups referring you for a job four years later.
He told me he was in a Proactive commercial. It didn't seem to work for him but he was buying me shots so I slept with him anyways.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
The shit I just took was my body's way of telling me bourbon and mixed nuts aren't an appropriate dinner. Well played, colon. WELL. PLAYED.
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
You need to somehow incorporate the phrase "these hoes ain't loyal" into your best man speech.
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
Randomize
