508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
"Take a picture of me motorboating molly" was probably not my best career move
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
Maid of honor screwed up the joke so I just got to explain what a strap on is and why a married lady might want one to Grandma and my brother's wedding shower.
I’m inviting a few of my favorite manwhores to a pool party. Bring booze and wear your banana hammock so Amy can see what I’m always talking about
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
WAIT YOU’VE NEVER BEEN TO COSTCO???
COSTCO IS MAGICAL
I can’t believe you two made a group text to scream at me about Costco.
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