I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
Looked like a bag of smashed assholes and smelt like a brewery - still got morning sex. Marriage rules sometimes!
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
Pretty sure I scared her away last night by putting a vodka tampon in my ass
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Randomize
