I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
A duck just looked me in the eye whilst I peed in a lake. I feel so dirty.
So I got this new job… ever been fucked in a corner office before?
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
My hangover headache is somewhere in the Harry Potter scar neighborhood. I can now empathize with that poor bastard.
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
Randomize
