im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
I am watching Grease 2 and properly learning how to apply a condom to a banana. This is a sign from God that this is the closest I will ever get to having the need for one.
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
I'm drinking keystone with a homeless man I found. It's making me feel uncomfortable.
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
I had another sex dream about you but it was very dissatisfying. As you finished you starting singing the star spangled banner. then you left. I was not amused.
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
Can my mom come with to the bar? Prince just died and I feel like I need to take her out to cheer her up.
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
Randomize
