woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
drunk guy next to me on the train just tried to share his pizza with me
he just tried to feed it to me...i love new york
I'm pretty sure last night was the first time I've seen someone drink beer-soaked paper towels. Ever.
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
So my niece decided to play "lets make shapes out of your bruises" with me and told me that one of them looks like a shark bite. Bravo, sir. Bravo.
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
So, last night I fell asleep sitting Indian-style on the floor, propped up against the front of the couch with an empty wine bottle in between my legs... How was your night?
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
Actually just remembered that solo cup full of scotch that random guy gave me for not farting on him. That's probably why
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
had to remind myself that killing him is not a good career move AGAIN.
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