I wish I had a waterproof laptop so that I would watch porn in the shower.
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
Training to be a housewife: cleaning the house and masturbating while cookies are in the oven.
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
Will you fuck me while I eat my burrito though? I'm kind of hungry.
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
You came out in nothing but lingerie and a Jedi robe claiming you needed more of those baby hot dog things or you were gonna go all Sith on us
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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