i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
I think I'm going to start texting all the people that don't want to talk to me
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
dude, never take two tylenol pm and smoke three bowls. i feel like i'm covered in cold ants.
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
I just destroyed that poor boy. Picked him up and put him wherever I wanted, it was like the Pride version of Elf on a Shelf.
It's taking all of my will power not to chug this margarita. This must be the life of an adult...
I know you do it only because of my toyota, but thank you for fucking me. Seriously.
Randomize
