You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
I knew my sister shouldn't have gone to the bacherlotte party. Two of the other brides maids have black eyes and my fiancé called me and asked if this is the crazy she's marrying
It was extremely weird and uncomfortable mid blow job she looks up and says " tell me Simon Cowell makes your dick hard"
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
i like coming up with different names when i reference that night. 'the night i got kicked out of the bar', 'the night i escaped from the hospital', 'the night we had that threeway'...
Randomize
