OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
Donald Trump and I would be so adorably orange together!
I consider my hand a solid 5. So if I'm dipping below a 7.5, I might as well go with old faithful.
I wanted to buy shoes but nothing fit. So i'm getting a vibrator.
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
Randomize
