had no condoms so I just made do with an empty doritos bag.
If relationships were based on ego stroking and meaningless sex, we'd be soulmates
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
The bottle I was drinking out of splintered on the bottom, there was glass in my hand, I pulled it out with my teeth... Not the best night for Drunk Kevin
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
I was preparing to do my walk of shame shirtless, but then I found my sweater, wallet and keys neatly piled under a tree in the park.
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
Immediately after I scarfed down an Applebee's appetizer trio for lunch, my boss sent me on an hour long road trip to pick up some parts. Great. I can't wait to shit my pants on US-31 South.
How do I have sand in my vagina if we were an hour away from the beach?
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
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