Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
k so who do I think I'm kidding applying to culinary school? I just fucked up a microwaveable pizza
I dont have enough money in my bank account to buy a pregnancy test. this wouldnt be the first time ive had to steal one either...
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
...I think i just fell in love with a random undergrad at first glance. He was the awkward young adult version of captain hook. Dear god i need to get off this campus.
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
Lo siento on account of my penis...
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
Randomize
