forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
im in an endless cycle of being too hung over to eat all day...then getting too drunk because i didnt eat anything. where is my life going?
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
Ps, did you know if you google "drunk jenga", you're the first image that shows up?
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
Dear America, sometimes I miss your Everclear and its consequences.
BABIES FOR EVERYONE. I'd be like Oprah except with babies
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
Sometimes the gods of alcohol choose to take you on a mysterious journey and you just have to go with it
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
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