Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
This is not a drunk text right now. This is an i want your dick text. There is a difference.
So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
I'm sexting at the thanksgiving dinner table...this is a new holiday tradition.
I made a Wendy's employee say fuck this and quit because I started flipping out due to a baked potato shortage. Of course I had a good night
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
Hey dude this is some next level no homo shit but im gonna get 2 tickets to the opera and go Hail Mary on this one girl. U take the extra ticket if i fail.
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
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