Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
what if every blade of grass was a penis?
Dude i was hungover i didnt know she was in the shower, she screamed i screamed we all screamed and i just so happend to piss in the shower.
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
I'm also 95% sure I had a conversation with someone on how hard it would be to jerk off with out opposable thumbs
and a jello shot exploded in my bra last night. Now I have blueberry smurfette boobs. Awesome.
When we were eating pie last night, I dropped some, and not only did you not judge me for far surpassing the 5 second rule, you let me use your foot to sock mop with. You're a good friend.
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
Dude. There are selfies on my phone of me, wide-eyed, sucking my pillow. We did NOT split that bag 50/50.
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
You're so sweet in the most vulgar ways
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
Randomize
