I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
My drug dealer just texted me that his kid had a rough sleep and was running late to deliver the ounce to my office. Totes adorbs.
There's a homeless man outside the bar. I have a toothbrush and toothpaste in my car. I think i'm going to give them to him. And they said drinking is bad.
You're so thoughtful.
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
WHAT THE FUCK I JUST PULLED TWO TAMPONS OUT OF MY VAGINA. WHERE DID THE OTHER ONE COME FROM??
....surprise!
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
Randomize
