none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
I can't leave. She doesn't trust me and my penis being out in the world without supervision.
What's the rule on cocaine before dinner?
Its 11 o'clock somewhere
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".
That is true. Vodka is like a dog. Always loyal, warm, and there for you when you need it
Im not coming back to that place until im drunk. If I walk in there sober Ill start screaming uncontrollably. Not words, just sounds.
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
I'm sending him pics of me in my new lingerie telling him to come over and when he gets here I'll have changed into like sweats and a 5 year old shirt with ketchup stains on it
I woke up in his closet, with my shirt inside out and backwards, Rolos in my hand, a tortilla with a face carved into it stuck to the fridge with a magnet, a homemade bong next to the bed, and the door off the hinges... I need a chaperone.
Just got thrown out of the club for making condom water balloons. I'm not ashamed.
I was stuffing my face while buying a brownie and coffee and some kid I fucked came up behind me and said. Someone's hungry.
Randomize
