I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
My clothes are covered in blood and I feel like I drank a gallon of elephant cum...it's safe to say I'm hungover
Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
Yeah I would come and meet you but there's 3 polish girls yelling at a drunk polish guy in the carpark outside. They just dumped a whole pizza over his head and I want to see where this ends...
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
when some dude came up to you and said he didn't like your shirt you just looked at him and firmly asked if he really thought that you gave a fuck.
Randomize
