I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
I'm standing in the shower drinking with the light off and a candle lit, listening to Amy Winehouse. Be proud.
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
the shoes thing blows my mind idk how the fuck i did that and im also missing 4 of my birth control pills like did i drunkenly decide to overload my body with estrogen
what are you getting to drink for new years?
well seeing as how i just got diagnosed with a uti, whatever we can mix with cranberry juice
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