He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
I managed to convince my mom that my hickey was a birth mark I have always had. She cried for an hour about being a terrible mother for never noticing it.
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
The cop told you to put your hands behind your back and you slurred "I'm not falling for that again"
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
2 things: 1) can you get hep from toilet water? And 2) do you know where we can get a new skillet for cheap?
Please tell me those aren't related.
I made rice.
i woke up with 5 inch heels locked on my feet and my car keys missing. this is gonna be an interesting walk home
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
I'm kinda glad you won't be in Vegas tomorrow because you'd make us go streaking or throw dead animals at them.
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