He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
based on the size of her vibrator, i'm going to be a huge disappointment
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
Dude, double fisting packs of Ramen saved my life last night
She's cute. And her snoring noises remind me of the incidental music from Jaws.
I came so hard I burst a blood vessel in my eye. If i cant marry this girl, I'm gonna have to switch teams.
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
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