Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
Im so hungover that my 6 year old cousine made me aspirine and coffee out of playdoh...
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
my greatest accomplishment from the city of diplomacy is that i puked at a table of 5 diplomats and my professor and NONE OF THEM NOTICED
Like do you hear me I PUKED IN MY OWN HANDS AND HE STILL SAID I WAS GORGEOUS
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
My fridge is empty and all of my food is in the bathtub. Just.. Why?
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
A bitchslap is in order.
Randomize