your room smells of hookers.
And success
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
i had to wake up at 4 am to do my laundry because I was afraid if I saw people in the laundry room they would judge me by the amount of clothes I had covered in vomit from syllabus week
Apparently someone switched my cash for monopoly money after midnight so I couldn't get any more drinks at the bar
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
Do you still have "be bumpin" written on your ass in glitter pen? Who brings a glitter pen to a bar? Or pulls there ass out for that matter...
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
Mom is so high she had to turn off the ceiling fan because it was going too fast and it freaked her out.
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
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