Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
as veruca salt said, "i want it now!"
uhh im not your indulgent father, stoned and im in the middle of making tacos. right now, tacos win
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
Yeah, half my ass was burnt and I was missing a shoe. I'm blaming you for the shoe.
Nothing is better than seeing someone you fucked go to the Olympics. I feel so American.
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
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