Needless to say when I told my parents they loved me less
You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
Sorry I pulled the thermostat off the wall..
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
I did not get laid last night bc my condoms were too small. I'm allowed to be dreary
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
Wrong. I really wanted to see the movie. And she was on top of me like she was riding a mechanical bull. Who am I to complain? I live to serve.
He's in grad school at Harvard. I suppose that means my vagina is now smarter than I am.
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
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