: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
Tried to buy Xanax from my boss last night. Wrong Mike.
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
she asked me what the final straw was. i had to tell her i caught him jerking off to digimon porn. i don't know what i'm more upset by, that he was masturbating to cartoons, or that he was masturbating to sub-par cartoons
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
He's drunk and putting on a tie for the jimmy john's delivery guy
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
You drunk invited us to do an intervention for you.
And by "schedule" I meant crumbled up liquor store receipt, that I wrote shit on.
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
one renamed every person in my phone 'I lpvw tewqils', so it would really help me out if you could text me your name. Happy sunday!
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
Randomize
