half the nation just spent an hour watching a balloon fly around. we are officially the dumbest fucking country.
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
Sitting next to a retarded hot married man on the plane, I got 6.5 hrs to homewreck this shit.
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
I saw his new girlfriend. She was flashing people, short and kinda chubby. I was happy with my life after that.
Randomize
